Want to feel in control of your life and future?
Although there are all kinds of things in life that are completely outside our control, we actually have much more control than we think. We have complete control over the thoughts, responses, and meanings we attach to circumstances. It takes daily practice, and a lot of work, but there is no better, more rewarding, or satisfying way to live life and feel in control.
To begin, raise awareness to the thoughts you already have on a consistent basis. The ones so common we rarely recognize. We create the reality that lies before us, and must acknowledge where we are now, in order to make any changes to move forward.
This post is about taking personal responsibility over our thoughts. Making our mind work FOR us, as opposed to letting all thoughts in our stream of unconsciousness run wild and rampant, like a child in our head knocking things over and causing chaos.
However exciting or not this may sound now, I PROMISE that this information, if applied and practiced, will DRASTICALLY change your quality of life and results.
Let's dive in.
Your Thoughts determine your Emotions. Your Emotions determine your Actions. Your Actions determines your Results.
The thoughts you have each day add up to determine the results you have in your whole life. What you choose or allow today will add up to determine your future and destiny.
Before skimming or jumping forward, take a minute to really ground yourself in the formula above. Strive to understand it in not just your MIND, but also your HEART.
To do this, run the formula through a recent example from your own life. Working backwards, ask yourself, “What thought lead me to feel and/or act this way to get this result?"
Get to the core of this thought. Is there anything deeper here to discover? What is the one thought driving all the others?
Once you find the thought living at the base of this example in your life, consider the following:
How often do I think this thought?
Is it true? Can I absolutely prove that it’s true?
Is it supportive?
Do I want to keep thinking this thought?
"If you think you can, you can. If you think you can’t, you’re right.” - Harrison Ford
Our minds are MUCH more powerful than we give credit. Our results, realities and destinies, begin and end in our minds.
Did you know that humans have an average of 70,000 thoughts per day?!
Consider how many of those thoughts you are conscious and aware of, versus how many you repeatedly cycle through out of habit.
What is my first thought when I wake up in the morning?
What am I thinking as I walk into work?
What thought do I have before starting something new?
What do I repeatedly tell myself after I fail?
How are those thoughts affecting you? What results do they provide?
Instead of living in constant reaction, consider the impact of consciously changing and choosing just some of the thousands of thought you have each day. Imagine training your brain to work FOR you. Like any training, it takes consciousness, commitment, practice, and repetition. That’s it.
- What have I lost/missed out on because of the negative thought patterns in my head?
- What could I gain by practicing to choose new thoughts?
There are two things in life:
- What's in our control (Anything INSIDE ourselves: Thoughts, Emotions, Actions, etc)
- What's NOT in our control (Anything OUTSIDE ourselves: Circumstances + Other People)
We are NOT in control of (1) circumstances that happen or (2) other people’s actions. We ARE in control of how we think, feel, and act in response to them.
In the same light, it is not solely a circumstance or person that makes us feel or act in a certain way, it is the meaning we attach to it, and the thoughts we choose to have about it.
Two people could have the exact same experience, but make it mean two completely different things. So it is not the circumstance itself that makes us think or feel, but it is our choice how we process it, what we make it mean, and how we use it.
I want to take a moment to acknowledge that there is a lot of injustice in the world today. Circumstances outside of our control have happened in our past, happen to us today, and will continue in the future. Everyone has something they're up against. You’re not alone.
What if instead we used injustice as a way to connect more deeply with each other in community? What if that which we thought separated us, actually is ground for bringing us together?
If we are to live as the strong people we are and created to be, we must choose thoughts and meaning that empower us to move forward and upward. Sitting in blame around circumstance, wrongdoing, etc, will only keep us stuck and stagnant where we are, lonely and unfulfilled.
The concept is simple. Not easy, but simple. It means that we are IN control of our lives if we are IN control of the thoughts in our mind.
The challenge here is it “puts us on the hook.” If you apply this insight, you can’t get away with playing "the victim of circumstance” card anymore. It asks that you swallow your pride, stop blaming, and take responsibility for your life, results, and reality.
Remember: these are only words on your screen unless you take them to HEART, and apply them to your life.
The theory is SIMPLE. The MAGIC is in the application.
I practice this on myself every. single. day. I’ve noticed a big shift in my life, and I hope the same for you.
I encourage you to memorize the formula over the next week, eternalize it, and applying it to your life each day. Catch yourself in moments of negative emotion. Instead of wallowing in it or reacting unconsciously, give yourself the space and time to lovingly ask the questions listed above. Bring awareness to the thought(s) that cause everything else. Write your answers down so you can see them.
Notice the moments you feel out of control, and ask yourself what you can do to get back in control. The opportunity is always there. Really. It’s a conscious choice.
And finally, remember that you were made for more. Clear the clutter from your mind, clean the thoughts, and choose better ones each day. You’re worth it. The world needs you to be in control of your mind and consciously creating your life.
Leave a comment below with any questions. What insight are you taking away and how will you apply it to your life? Let me know!
If you’re interested in looking deeper and getting coaching around this personally, please reach out to me about one-on-one coaching. I’m now offering sessions in person and over phone, Skype and FaceTime! First sample session is complimentary!
Sending all my love.